Writing and Children

 The act of writing - that time you spend facing your monitor or pen and paper - demands solitude.  When children enter the equation, all writing tends to cease.  To your children, your solitude needs to be filled with their chirpy little voices.

These intrusions wreak havoc on your writing day.  Of course, the fact that you profess writing as a profession means you embrace distraction like the unrepentant dieter embraces a Big Mac.  Children pride themselves on your attention.  Your ego swells from their desire for your time.  Children therefore take on the role of 'most dangerous distraction' from your writing.

You must learn to balance your time between children and your craft.  Pick logical times to write by taking advantage of your children's schedule.  Awareness on your part of time slots available to write will increase your productivity and allow you a 'thinking' window of opportunity as well.

A 'thinking' window is that period of time before you write when you get the chance to 'think through' the subject matter of the day's writing assignment.  Many plot lines and dialog have been dreamed up in that time pre-writing when you mull over what you've been writing or working out in your head.

Older children are more pliable when it comes to disturbing your writing rhythm.  They can be told you are working on some important project and that you shouldn't be disturbed.  This does not rule out the possibility of distraction though.  Siblings fight.  This is something that has been true for millennia.

An astute author will spend time with older children, even if only fifteen minutes, to establish the importance of his solitary time.  Most children want that connection to happen without their bidding.  As savvy writer provides for their children's emotional needs before he sits to write, otherwise, feuds crop up, tranquility disappears and you have to step out of your writing zone to feel any impact.

There can be upsides to children. Other than providing loads of writing fodder to your waiting keyboard, children can become interested in reading and writing simply because you obviously love what you do.

My fourteen-year-old daughter has always been an avid reader.  When she was thirteen, she wrote an online fan fiction based on the Eragon book series by Paolini.  She wrote over 60,000 words in three months.  I encouraged her to write a novel of her own.  She responded with a book that nine months later is four chapters from completion. 

I never pushed for my daughter to follow in my footsteps, but she has and I am thrilled.  So, writing with children can have great reward as well.  I still have a very young child that loves my attention.  I've learned to give her attention in twenty minute doses.  This is usually all she needs for a couple hours.

Don't allow your children to come between you and your work, and certainly do not allow your work and passion to come between you and your family.  You need each other more than you'll ever realize.